Beating up on self.
We do that.
If a friend came up to you and confessed a painful moment, a moment she is not proud of, what would you say to her? Would you berate her, tell her she is worthless, nothing? Would you remind her of all of her mistakes over and over again?
Would you, instead, tell her to go easy, be gentle, let it go, we all make mistakes? Would you remind her that in that moment, that was where she was at, but she has grown and is a better person today? Would you remind her of all the good she has contributed to the planet just by being who she is or would you just focus on her perceived faults or mistakes? Would you remind her that every single person on this planet makes mistakes, has good and bad (a shadow self) but loving ALL parts is the greatest gift you could give to yourself and to the planet?
What kind of friend are you to yourself?